Tony Carbonara. File photo
By Jim Shilander and Andrea Swayne
Tony Carbonara, one of San Clemente’s most prominent citizens and restaurateurs, died Thursday evening after being hospitalized for a stroke he suffered the previous day.
Carbonara Trattoria was filled with laughter, loud talk, fellowship and shared remembrances Thursday night, the way its owner Carbonara, had always kept it and would have wanted it, said friends.
Traci Daniel, Carbonara’s employee and longtime family friend, said the restaurateur suffered a medial pontine hemorrhagic stroke of the brain stem Wednesday while driving to work just after 9 a.m. In great pain, he had pulled over to the side of Avenida Palizada just after exiting Interstate 5 when a customer recognized him and called 911. The first responders to the scene were also longtime friends, she said.
After arriving at the hospital, Carbonara was placed into a medically induced coma from which he did not awake. Family, friends and employees were all able to say their goodbyes before he was removed from life support at 6 p.m. Thursday. He died shortly thereafter. Carbonara was 59.
Peggy Vance, the executive director of the San Clemente Ocean Festival, said the city had rarely had a greater supporter.
“Tony is everybody’s friend,” Vance said. “His heart was bigger than anybody’s. I can’t imagine San Clemente without Tony. His generosity was beyond measure. His love for his family and his community were unsurpassed. I’m going to miss him a lot. There’s definitely going to be a void.”
Tom McKeown got to know Carbonara the way many in San Clemente had, by meeting him at his restaurant. McKeown said he and his wife stopped in the first week it was open.
“We got to be very good friends,” McKeown said. “Tony is Mr. San Clemente. He has done so much for this city, just by being a sponsor for so many events. He just constantly gives. He always has.”
McKeown and Vance were among several dozen who’d gathered at the Trattoria Thursday to celebrate Carbonara’s life and mourn his loss.
“This is very much a Carbonara’s evening,” McKeown said. “There are a lot of people having a good time, good food and a lot of noise.”
Carbonara Trattoria, at 111 Avenida Del Mar, has been a popular downtown dining destination for over 20 years.
Carbonara was also one of the most popular caterers in south Orange County and was well known throughout the area.
San Clemente Mayor Bob Baker issued a statement Friday via email calling Carbonara a friend and an important part of the fabric of the city.
“Tony Carbonara was an institution in San Clemente. If there was a civic event or fundraiser, everyone knew they could count on Carbonara’s to go above and beyond. I was proud to call him a friend; and his many friends are going to miss him dearly,” Baker wrote. “Sincerest condolences go out to the Carbonara family from the Baker family and from all the residents of San Clemente. It’s a sad day for all of San Clemente.”
Tony, we’ll miss you my friend.
Mary, Tony will be waiting for you in Heaven.
Good-Bye my friend
I’m really going to miss my friend Tony. He always made me laugh. A great man with a big heart.
God Bless to the Carbonara family. Tony will be missed by many for the love that he gave so freely
A friend to everyone, and a pillar in San Clemente.
This mans huge heart will be missed forever !
He was everywhere in San Clemente! I will miss his smile…..
Mary and Family, You are in our thoughts and prayers. Blessings to your family, Sue and John Allen, Lake Forest
Thank you Tony. I loved gettin that little smirk from you. And everything else of course. My respects to the family. Love, Steve Ryan
San Clemente has lost one of the great ones. May he rest in peace. We will always remember what a great legacy he leaves.
He had a contagious smile. His presence would light up a room, filling it with laughter. RIP my friend xo. My prayers go out to the family. His legacy lives on in all of you!!!
Tony was a good friend to us all, we worked together and hung out for the last 15 years. He was a great guy who did so much for so many. I will miss that great smile and laugh… rest in peace, my brother, see you on the next level!
Tony, peace and rest. You were special and now are in the arms of love.
Peace,
Pastor Pondo Vleisides and Talega Life Church
Tony will be deeply missed. He was a blessing to many.
Mary and Family, you are in our prayers.
After 23 years of working side by side in the Del Mar Plaza, we will miss Tony coming in every day just to talk about different things. He was a great guy and will be missed by all.
Mary, Christine and Michelle and all his family, you are all in our prayers. RIP Tony.
My wife and I met Tony but once, years ago and his daughter Michelle’s wedding. Even so we saw his passion for live and love. We’re so sorry for this family loss and your whole community’s loss.
Dear Mary and family, I have tears streaming down my face as I reply to the sudden loss for all us, of our one-of-a-kind dear Tony. I am in Ecuador, South America, and if I could be there to give you a heartfelt hug I would. So you see, truly your loss is felt around the world. Wish I could be there to do the dishes for the endless stream of people that will be with you during this time. There are no words to fully express the appreciation for all that the Carbonara family has done and meant to this community. I know in my heart you will keep on this rich tradition! All my love, Cathleen Walker
A sad day for many. Peace and comfort to you, Mary and family.
I know Mr Carbonara’s daughter Michelle and she has always spoke very highly of him as I see why……What a truly wonderful Man that will be missed…My thoughts and prays go out to ALL the families……..
Ruth Buechs (From Upstate NY)
I was Diane Broda’s teacher many years ago. I saw her comments on face book about the death of Tony Carbonara. Being an Italian myself I have known personalities like Tony. Most Italians seem to have a zest for life that reaches out and touches so many others. It’s a part of our heritage. And when they are gone they leave a void in our hearts that feels like it will last forever. But the pain does gradually fade and wonderful memories are left that softens the blow. My brother passed away 2 years ago. Many of the lives that he touched were there at his funeral. He was another Tony. May they both rest in peace.
Michelle and family you are in our thoughts and prayers so sorry for your loss.
Tony,quel ridere cosi forte e simpatico ,come la tua mamma che ti amava tantissimo posso dirtelo io Lina che spessissimo ero con lei mi raccontava tante cose belle di voi. Mery tu sempre bella vicino a lui come una coppia invidiabile.Vorremmo tanto averlo potuto vedere ancora.Il Signore l’abbia tra le sue braccia : A te Mery,Cristina,Michelle con amore ciao…
This news came to me today. I feel loss. Tony was a kind person I won’t forget. I shared so many truely great times with him.
Michelle and family we are sorry to hear about your loss. You are in our thoughts and prayers. God Bless.
Tony, we will miss you here in san clemente. you were a great person and a hardworker and it def shows. i send my blessings to all of his family.
Tony was a great man and he will be missed. Tony gave so much to our community, his kindness and generosity will never be forgotten. My thoughts and prayers are with Mary and the Carbonara family. God Bless.
Tony will be missed and his commitment to his family and the community of San Clemente will not be forgotten. God Bless to all of you in the Carbonara family and may His peace carry you through your loss.
I discovered San Clemente by accident on a surfing trip to San Onofre, needing a hotel for one night- all of the sudden I’m at the casa romantica and met Tony (the best lamb I’ve ever tasted!)- He welcomed me to SC with open arms and offered his help. It is a privilege and honor to have known him. Rest in Peace Tony, you;ll never be forgotten.