• Support
  • Advertise
  • Locations
  • Contact
Tuesday, September 26, 2023
No Result
View All Result
NEWSLETTERS
San Clemente Times
  • Calendar
    • Event Calendar
    • Submit an Event
  • Sections
    • Eye on SC
    • Soapbox
      • Submit a Letter
    • Getting Out
    • SC Living
    • Sports & Outdoors
    • SC Surf
    • Dana Point Times
    • Capistrano Dispatch
  • Digital Edition
  • Best of SC
  • Explore SC
  • Legals & Classifieds
    • Locals Only Business Directory
    • Classifieds
    • Submit a Classified
    • Obituaries
    • Announcements
    • Submit an Announcement
    • Legal & Public Notice Advertising
  • Special Publications
    • A New You
    • Aging Well – For the Young at Heart
    • Best of San Clemente
    • Crib to College
    • Festival of Whales Event Program
    • Go See Do
    • Good Eats
    • Graduation Special
    • Holiday Happenings & Gift Guide
    • Home Improvement Guide 2023
    • Money Matters
    • San Clemente Trolley Route Map
    • Summer Camp Guide
    • Swallows Day Parade & Mercado Event Guide
    • The Green Issue
    • Triton Football Preview
    • WSL Rip Curl Guide 2023
  • Real Estate
    • South County Real Estate Guide
    • Real Estate – Who’s Who
  • Calendar
    • Event Calendar
    • Submit an Event
  • Sections
    • Eye on SC
    • Soapbox
      • Submit a Letter
    • Getting Out
    • SC Living
    • Sports & Outdoors
    • SC Surf
    • Dana Point Times
    • Capistrano Dispatch
  • Digital Edition
  • Best of SC
  • Explore SC
  • Legals & Classifieds
    • Locals Only Business Directory
    • Classifieds
    • Submit a Classified
    • Obituaries
    • Announcements
    • Submit an Announcement
    • Legal & Public Notice Advertising
  • Special Publications
    • A New You
    • Aging Well – For the Young at Heart
    • Best of San Clemente
    • Crib to College
    • Festival of Whales Event Program
    • Go See Do
    • Good Eats
    • Graduation Special
    • Holiday Happenings & Gift Guide
    • Home Improvement Guide 2023
    • Money Matters
    • San Clemente Trolley Route Map
    • Summer Camp Guide
    • Swallows Day Parade & Mercado Event Guide
    • The Green Issue
    • Triton Football Preview
    • WSL Rip Curl Guide 2023
  • Real Estate
    • South County Real Estate Guide
    • Real Estate – Who’s Who
No Result
View All Result
San Clemente Times
No Result
View All Result

On Life and Love After 50: Big Yellow Taxi

Staff by Staff
April 28, 2022 3:40AM
in SC LIVING, SC Living Headlines
On Life and Love after 50: Three Widowers, Divorced Man Ages 60-90 Comment on Dating

Tom Blake

0
SHARES
Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
Tom Blake

By Tom Blake

Last week, I received an email with this subject line: “Both widowed, he is living an amazing life.” The email had been sent from a link on my website. I did not recognize the sender’s name or email address.

The message read: “Dating a high school friend. We really connect. We are both widowed. I have kids … they are fairly independent. He is an amazing father of three daughters ages 45 to 51 and has seven grandchildren and a 96-year-old mom living near him.

“We love each other … I think. But we are in a long-distance relationship. He is in California; I am in Illinois. He texts me his day-to-day happenings, and we talk on the phone every 10 days. It’s been four and a half months since we’ve been together.

“He had a knee replacement and is recovering well. He seems all on board, and his daughters seem receptive of me. But I am afar. I feel like a vacay gal.

“Where do I fit? Am I wasting the time I have left? What do you think?”

I felt it was not my place to advise her about wasting her time or not. I’m a columnist, not a relationship counselor. Besides, she didn’t provide enough information to give her an intelligent answer.

I get questions like this often from single seniors. In responding to a situation like this, it’s best for me to ask questions that might nudge her to answer her own question.

I emailed her back. For openers, I asked, “What is a vacay gal?” Followed by:

“How often have you been together in person?”

“Did you re-meet at a reunion?”

“What do you want? To move to California or him to Illinois?”

She responded: “A vacay gal is when you are in a long-distance relationship, but you only take vacations together. I knew him in high school. We are both 72 and widowed. We reunited at our last reunion in 2018.

“A year ago, we started emailing, texting and talking. He visited me in Illinois for a week last October. I visited him in California at the end of December. We really hit it off. We would have visited again, but he had knee replacement surgery March 8. He is doing well and will visit me May 15 for three weeks. Plus, we have a trip planned to Hawaii in September.”

And then she added: “I doubt he would move, because his three daughters, seven grandkids and mother live in the same California town.

“I want a partner in life and a loving relationship.”

I responded to her: “Wasting your time? Heck, I think you’ve got a good thing going. What do you expect him to do?”

“You didn’t answer the key question: “Would you be willing to move to California, and would he want that?”

We’ll see what she says. Her emails remind me of a 1972 song by Joni Mitchell called “Big Yellow Taxi.” More specifically, this stanza:

Late last night, I heard the screen door slam

And a big yellow taxi took away my old man

Don’t it always seem to go

That you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone?

The final sentence “Don’t it always seem to go. That you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone” is repeated five times in the song.

Maybe, she’ll realize she’s got a good thing before the big yellow taxi takes him away.

Tom Blake is a retired Dana Point business owner and resident who has authored books on middle-aged dating. See his website at findingloveafter50.com. To comment: tompblake@gmail.com.

Share this:

  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)

Related

Tags: Dana PointDatinglong-distance relationshipOn Life and Love After 50Orange Countyreader questionsRelationshipsSan ClementeSan Juan CapistranoSenior Datingvacay gal
ShareTweetPin
Staff

Staff

Related Posts

Dana Wharf Whale Report: Feeding Frenzies Showcase Incredible Volume of Species for Whale, Bird Watching Trips

Dana Wharf Whale Report: Feeding Frenzies Showcase Incredible Volume of Species for Whale, Bird Watching Trips

September 25, 2023
GALLERY: South County Cleanups Up Waterways, Beaches

GALLERY: South County Cleanups Up Waterways, Beaches

September 25, 2023
GALLERY: San Clemente Celebrates SC High Homecoming with Annual Student Parade

GALLERY: San Clemente Celebrates SC High Homecoming with Annual Student Parade

September 24, 2023
Capistrano Beach Family Finds, Adopts Formerly-Stray Dogs

Capistrano Beach Family Finds, Adopts Formerly-Stray Dogs

September 22, 2023 - Updated on September 23, 2023
Next Post
San Clemente Boys Volleyball Clinches Share of League Title in Five-Set Thriller over Tesoro

Triton Report: League Champion Boys Volleyball Hosts Playoff Opener Thursday

Discussion about this post

No Result
View All Result

SC Times Daily
Get important news and updates delivered straight to your inbox. Sign up here.

Subscriptions
Don’t get the SC Times delivered to your home? Subscribe today.

Advertising
Get new customers and drive traffic to your business. Advertise with us.

Support Local Journalism
For less than the cost of a couple of cups of coffee a month, become an “Insider” member and continue to get “Local News You Can Use” from the only independently owned, dedicated local news organization in South Orange County.

Contribute today.

Picket Fence Media is a proud member of the SoCal Media Network.

  • Archive
  • Contact Us
  • Dana Point Times
  • The Capistrano Dispatch
  • Terms of Use
  • About Us

© 2023 Picket Fence Media

No Result
View All Result
  • Calendar
    • Event Calendar
    • Submit an Event
  • Sections
    • Eye on SC
    • Soapbox
      • Submit a Letter
    • Getting Out
    • SC Living
    • Sports & Outdoors
    • SC Surf
    • Dana Point Times
    • Capistrano Dispatch
  • Digital Edition
  • Best of SC
  • Explore SC
  • Legals & Classifieds
    • Locals Only Business Directory
    • Classifieds
    • Submit a Classified
    • Obituaries
    • Announcements
    • Submit an Announcement
    • Legal & Public Notice Advertising
  • Special Publications
    • A New You
    • Aging Well – For the Young at Heart
    • Best of San Clemente
    • Crib to College
    • Festival of Whales Event Program
    • Go See Do
    • Good Eats
    • Graduation Special
    • Holiday Happenings & Gift Guide
    • Home Improvement Guide 2023
    • Money Matters
    • San Clemente Trolley Route Map
    • Summer Camp Guide
    • Swallows Day Parade & Mercado Event Guide
    • The Green Issue
    • Triton Football Preview
    • WSL Rip Curl Guide 2023
  • Real Estate
    • South County Real Estate Guide
    • Real Estate – Who’s Who

© 2023 Picket Fence Media