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Tom Blake

By Tom Blake

The title of my Sept. 23 column was “Where Are the Single Men?” In that article, I quoted Marci, a single woman, age 70, who said: “I live in Orange County. I am retired and would love to meet an available, honest, adventurous man. Where is he?”

Normally, a comment like Marci’s would draw responses from men aged 75 and older, who want to contact single women younger than they are.

So, I was surprised when the first two men who responded were considerably younger than Marci.  

One young widower from Capistrano Beach wrote, “I’m 56 and still single. It’s been tough dating lately, thanks to COVID-19. I’m not giving up on women; they used to just fall in my lap without me looking.

“I guess I’m just too picky with the ladies, but I get flirted with a lot when I venture out to get a quick drink and a taste of social interaction. I’m focused on doing fun stuff with my son, age 20, before he moves out and moves on. He is itching to get out there in the world. When that happens, I’ll be online dating, I’m sure.”

I answered, “I am pleased to know that young people read these senior dating articles.”

Another response came from 61-year-old Tom of San Juan Capistrano, who emailed that he’d like to contact Marci, who is 10 years older than he is.

I responded to Tom, “You asked for Marci’s email address. Of course, I always ask permission to give out someone’s email address before passing it on to strangers. Marci said she is now dating a man who might even be marriage material. Hence, she is out of the dating ballgame for now.

“However, it’s good to know you are 61 and live in SJC. I will keep my eyes open for you.”

Also, from that article, I was pleased to know that our newspapers are being read by people in Laguna Niguel.

Connieemailed: “I live in Laguna Niguel and have known about you for ages. I was at a family member’s house in San Juan Capistrano and saw your article titled ‘Where are All the Men?’ in The Capistrano Dispatch paper.

“In that article, you mentioned that single women, when initially exchanging contact info with potential dates, should only reveal a first name and email address, but not the last name or home address.

“My email, like yours, exposes my last name. I hate to manage too many more emails. I also manage another email as chairperson of City of Orange Hearing Loss Association (

“I’ve worn hearing aids for years and got a cochlear implant in one ear two years ago. We have been doing social events and Zoom meetings. It’s been hard reading lips with people wearing masks, but we are used to finding creative ways to overcome obstacles.

“I have never been on a dating site. I prefer the old-fashioned way of meeting potential mates. Maybe you can do a Zoom meeting for one of our upcoming meetings. We can title it ‘How to navigate the dating scene with a hearing loss.’ It would be hilarious. 

“Thanks for all you do to keep others busy and happy. Amazing work! Like so many others, you never knew where your path was going to lead. I’m finally calling myself retired at 70, whatever that means.”

In my answer to Connie, I noted that the column “mentioned that the internet can be a valuable dating tool, which is especially true during pandemic times, when people are not venturing out as much. Consider giving internet dating a try, but just be careful.

“Retired at 70 means you are still active and busy, and helping people. Keep it up!”


Tom Blake will be the guest speaker at the Dana Point Historical Society meeting on Wednesday, Oct. 27, when he’ll talk about his new book Tutor & Spunky’s Deli: A Dana Point Landmark. The meeting, which is free to attend and open to the public, is scheduled for 7 p.m. at the Dana Point City Council Chambers. Seating is limited, so guests are encouraged to arrive early.

Tom Blake is a retired Dana Point business owner and resident who has authored books on middle-aged dating. See his website at To comment:

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