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Wavelengths By Jim Kempton
By Jim Kempton

Could it be that “The Donald” really is the guy who should be running the country?

By Jim Kempton

Donald Trump is an American icon.

But when you run for president, almost every candidate is criticized for one thing or another. That’s why “The Donald” could be such a powerful candidate. On every issue he’s got the others beat—call it a trump card.

The big crisis with Bill Clinton when he ran was the charges of womanizing. That would be no problem. Trump knows exactly how to handle pesky media snoops: “You know, it really doesn’t matter what the media writes as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of a**.” It makes a great campaign slogan: He could simply ask “Are you better off than you were four wives ago?”

George W. Bush was accused of evading combat duty by joining the National Guard. Trump on the other hand has done battle with Barbara Walters, Lindsey Graham and seen hand-to-hand combat with Rosie O’Donnell.

John Kerry’s presidential campaign was damaged by the “swift boat” accusations that because he was shot in the buttocks he wasn’t really a war hero. Taking an open watercraft down enemy rivers in a full-on firefight only qualifies if you are hit in the right spot. But “The Donald” trumped that accusation by a rifle length.

“John McCain’s not a war hero,” Trump recently said. “He’s a war hero because he was captured. I like people that weren’t captured.”

Apparently being tortured for five years in a Vietnamese prison after being shot down over enemy territory doesn’t count either.

Obama has gotten into hot water for his stance on the definition of marriage. That’s another area where Trump has everyone beat. Trump knows the definition of marriage perfectly—it’s between an old, very rich, multiply-divorced man and a much younger woman.

Woody Allen never ran for president, but he was ostracized for dating and then marrying his wife’s adopted daughter. That’s no issue in Trump’s mind. As he said in a 2006 interview regarding his daughter Ivanka, “she does have a very nice figure. I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”

Ronald Reagan was accused of mixing entertainment with politics. When asked if it was hard adjusting to being president after being an actor, he replied that he couldn’t imagine anyone being president without being an actor. But Reagan was talking about communication; Reagan called out Russia to “tear down this wall.” Trump topped the Gipper; he called out a Senator’s cell phone number.

George Bush was excoriated for raising taxes, even though it prevented the continuation of a massive deficit. Trump has a far superior solution to debt: he just declares himself insolvent. His three bankruptcies cost banks and bondholders millions. But they didn’t read his lips.

Jimmy Carter literally lost his second term bid by failing to negotiate the Iranian hostage crisis in time. Trump meanwhile has the unmatched achievement of brokering a peace treaty on Celebrity Apprentice between Gary Busey and Meat Loaf.

But don’t ever sell Donald Trump short. Anyone who can pull off that hairdo is capable of miracles.

 Jim Kempton is an Orange County writer who knows one this for sure—the only group that will be totally devastated if Trump is eliminated from the Presidential race are the comedians.

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comments (2)

  • Whatta great piece of writing, Jim–organized, detailed, funny! While I’d expected praise for the bumptious Donald, who has been trumping his myriad rivals, you surprised readers like me. The womanizing, bankrupt, chicken hawk is a narcissist of the first water.

    Writing in the NYT, Frank Bruni extends your message by asking why evangelical Christians are embracing his candidacy. “He just about runs the table on the seven deadly sins. He personifies greed, embodies pride, radiates lust. Wrath is covered by his anti-immigrant, anti-“losers” rants, and if we interpret gluttony to include big buildings and not just Big Macs, he’s a glutton through and through. That leaves envy and sloth. I’m betting that he harbors plenty of the former, though I’ll concede that he exhibits none of the latter.” People like me DO observe Trump’s intellectual laziness. He’s done little to bone up on the grave issues confronting the country but watch, as he admitted, the Sunday morning tv shows.

    If Californians had more involvement in winnowing the wheat from the electoral chaff, do you think this celebrity would be taken as seriously?

  • Yes, Trump is crass in his statements, but claiming Bill Clinton was just womanizing is a gross understatement. A number of women accused him of sexual harassment including rape and some of these same women came under further harassment by Hillary, the current Democratic nominee.
    Hillary said that when women say they have been assaulted, they are to be believed; unless, of course, they are women your husband has abused, then its ok to harass them further to gain their silence. Some advocate for women.

    Yes, neither Trump nor Hillary served in the military but Hillary is notorious for her rudeness to those in uniform, particularly her secret service detail and she has received an 81% unfavorable rating by military members including 69% who said VERY unfavorable. When members of her Secret Service detail greeted her with a “good morning” she replied “F…off”.

    Kerry’s problems weren’t that he didn’t serve honorably, it is that he exaggerated his service as documented by the swift boat veterans and then disparaged the military he had served in.

    Trump’s statement about McCain was disreputable as were Hillary’s statements about Trump’s supporters. In addition, she has disparaged Bernie’s supporters and was in collusion with the Democratic Party to fix the election against Bernie.

    Like many Americans, Trump has been married more than once but Hillary, in partnership with her husband, allows Bill to philander and abuse women and then she harasses these women to insure their silence.

    Regarding Woody Allen marrying his former wife’s daughter, Jim Kempton says “That’s no issue in Trump’s mind” and then he goes on to quote Trump where he demonstrates it IS an issue because she IS his daughter. Apparently, Kempton didn’t notice the inconsistency in his claims.

    Trump calls out a senator’s cell phone, Hillary calls for wiki leaks founder, Julian Assange, to be droned.

    Trump has employed thousands, Hillary has only employed enough to harass the women Bill Clinton abused.

    Trump has brokered many deals; Hillary? How’s that reset with Russia coming along? How about her deal to remove Colonel Gaddafi, a nasty brute who had ceased to be a threat to America? After Hillary brought her knowledge and experience to the table, it became a hotbed of terrorism and then she failed to insure our embassy staff had adequate security resulting in four dead Americans including the first ambassador to be killed in the line of duty since 1988.

    We won’t sell Hillary short either. She has demonstrated she’ll fix the election if she can (sorry Bernie), and has spent her entire career in corruption and lying. Pulling the lever for Hillary is the text book definition of insanity…voting for the same corrupt officials and expecting a different outcome.

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